text; un: keith

[spaceassassin]

hey

[ so far so good ]

i got a friend who's got a problem
a big problem that's… small, i guess

anyone know a cure for shrinkage

Comments

[Anonymous]

[janescayre]

take your top off and rub it a little

[spaceassassin]

[ brain not computing the troll ]

rub it on what
my friend?

[ it = shirt, CLEARLY ]

sounds fake

un: dewdrop

[declass]

What

[spaceassassin]

what part of that did you not understand

text; un: itadori

[notpicky]

usually warming up a little works for me

...but I heard too much time in a hot bath is also bad

[spaceassassin]

[ shiro, the magic grow capsule toy
just get him wet and watch him expand

sounds legit ]

wait
this happened to you too?

text ↪ un: 十五

[zangetsu]

ask your gross questions somewhere else man

1/2

[spaceassassin]

[ wow. who is this?
the netherwork police?
this is a public posting area
keith’s allowed to be here ]

how is this gross

2/2

[spaceassassin]

[ actually
YOU KNOW WHAT ]

if you’re not gonna help, stop clogging up this space
no one asked you anyway

text; un: strife

[mercedis]

...Clothes?

( please let it be clothes. )

[spaceassassin]

[ sorry ]

no
those are staying the same

un: undying

[midway]

That's a lot to advertise in front of a forum of strangers.

[spaceassassin]

[ desperate times, my dude ]

not a lot of other places to go
figured there wasn’t a rule against asking for help on here

un: traveler

[unalign]

[ man the network is just. and the responses are all p much what she's also thinking about so maybe!! ]

What exactly shrunk?
Just to be sure, you know.

[spaceassassin]

my friend

[ he’s helping ]

un: fraldarius

[boarwitness]

Delete this.

[he's two for two for horny network posts]

Why does everyone have to deal with you exhibitionists.

[spaceassassin]

[ EXCUSE YOU SIR
KEITH DOES WHAT HE WANTS WHEN HE WANTS WHERE HE –

come again? ]

that word doesn’t mean what you think it does
because what

[ – the fuck ]

un: shiro

[constellational]

⟪ THIS IS A TRAINWRECK TAKE THAT PHONE AWAY FROM HIM. ⟫

Yep
somehow I should have expected that
Know any way to shrink faster?

[spaceassassin]

[ hello friend
keith is acquiring assistance


… from no one reliable ]

literally the opposite of our goal here

text — un: vv

[lapses]

Seek the healer stationed at the docks. She may be able to assist you if it is a medical issue.

[spaceassassin]

you’re talking about sakura right
figured she’s more a surgeon than whatever this calls for
but you’re right. probably a good idea to cover all the bases

un: jonas.

[coherer]

ik by reading other people's responses that this is not what you wanted, but we have got to work on your accidental innuendos, man. For real.

All I want to know is if it's contagious.

[spaceassassin]

[ who knew the netherworld consisted of dirty-minded people
keith didn't

but now he is wiser ]

i said exactly what i needed
anyone who misread that is the problem, not me

don’t think so
i’m still the same size

late with coffee tag... un: viktor

[theorems]

Assuming bad wordplay for your sake. When did this begin, and how much has it progressed?

late tags are still good tags!

[spaceassassin]

[ viktor is a good bean
keith likes him better than everyone in here.
… except shiro. ]

best estimate of two days ago
he’s lost a foot in height and he’s shrinking in build, too
can’t be sure if it’s a result of something he consumed or interacted with
but this place has been messing with his body in other ways too