text; un: 🍥🍜

[acknowledgement]

(≡ ｀ｗ´≡)/
hey everyone!
i'm Uzumaki Naruto
um in my world we give family name first
so you can just call me Naruto!

listen…
i have an important question that i'd like to hear your opinions on

some people doubt this place is really the afterlife
and if we’re actually dead

but let’s say there’s a chance we can all return to our own dimensions, alive
…would you want to?
or would you prefer to stay here instead, permanently?

it’s kinda personal, so i get it if you wanna use the
uh
anonymous
thingy
just don’t ask me how to switch it on
because idk (that means i don’t know)

oh also
if anyone needs help with anything
or wants to tackle some missions together
i'm your shinobi!

[Sorry, Sasuke and Sakura. Naruto forgot the “keep our profession/backgrounds a secret” rule. (And already broke the rule several times over.)]

Comments

[acknowledgement]

[........................He just...needed to make that clear.]

what's going on Jonas-chan?
if you need help while we're here tell me
i know things aren't ideal but
i hope you aren't in trouble or something

[coherer]

The instant regret I feel not making this anonymous is overwhelming.

[acknowledgement]

IT WASN'T A KISS

SO THERE'S NOTHING TO REGRET

not here

[chokuto]

[what the hell is this

HE'S NOT RESPONDING BUT HE SEES IT]

not here.

[coherer]

(please no bully...)

[coherer]

You mean it's like this whole thing was a huge misunderstanding that could've been ignored forever and never brought up again???

WOW, I'M REELING.

[acknowledgement]

EXCEPT YOU KISSED BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[But Naruto...you can only "kiss back" if it was a kiss to begin with.]

[coherer]

DUDE, SHUT UP. I AM BEGGING YOU.

(SHOULD HE BLOCK HIM? SHOULD HE BLOCK NOCTIS? SHOULD HE DIE?)

[not here]

[janescayre]

[WHAT

WHAT HAPPENED??

WHERE... When.... For how long....

did it awaken things inside them.......]

not here.

[coherer]

(FUKAWA, DON'T LOOK!!!)

[janescayre]

[Time to invent a scenario herself then

and sell it as a book for profit]

[acknowledgement]

well answer my question then!!
what's going on
are things really bad for you here?
i can try to help out!

[coherer]

Things are bad for everyone. It's not like I've gotten myself into any trouble, it's just the nature of being here, right?

Like you want to go home, don't you?

[acknowledgement]

yeah that's true...

and yeah! i do wanna get home
but not if i have to leave friends behind
i wanna make sure everyone gets to where they need to be first

[coherer]

Everyone? Just your good friends like that Sasuke guy, you mean?

(the alternative would be INCONCEIVABLE)

[acknowledgement]

not just Sasuke!
you too, Jonas-chan!

[coherer]

(...)

Not to like...... look a gift horse in the mouth or whatever, but why? We barely know each other, man.

If you guys have a chance to bail, you should 100% do that.

[fessus]

Wow

I mean congrats lol

[ MY LOL MASKS MY BEWILDERMENT ]

1/2

[coherer]

(why, god?

why forsake me? i know i wasn't your most faithful servant, but i did the best i could. i did my time, i repented, i was rebuilding, i was working hard to contribute to society. was it not enough? what do you want from me?

what do you want from me?)

2/2

[coherer]

It is literally the opposite of what you're thinking.

[fessus]

I don't even know what I'm thinking so

Actually I take that back. The opposite would be me being 100% not confused at all. So does this secretly make total sense?

[ ... ]

He's pretty cool ig

[ Just so that Jonas won't be... too embarrassed... ]

[coherer]

fr dude?

Are you fr doing this rn?

(jonas forgives noctis. jonas forgives noctis because noctis has no idea how easy it'd be for them to turn this all around and drag him down with them.

ah, so this is the high road. it's beautiful.)

Naruto and I didn't kiss. It was all a huge misunderstanding.

It's a "you had to be there" thing. Which you weren't at any point.

[fessus]

Look I don't have to "do this" I can just say I fully believe nothing happened and it's your own business and let it go.

[ like mazel tov, okay, you can hide your weird clandestine new relationship all you want ]

But you're seriously asking me to believe he's smart enough to lie and I've talked to him more than once so that's a hard sell.

[acknowledgement]

[Naruto discovered how to read other public comments finally. Just in time.]

A HARD SELL?
WELL GUESS WHAT
IT WAS YOUR BODY KISSING HIM
SO WHO’S THE DUMBASS NOW

[Sorry Jonas.]

[coherer]

He literally said "it wasn't a kiss" like scroll up omg

I can't believe this is happening in this depressing a post. Like everyone else is pouring their hearts out and then there's this glaring error.