text; un: 🍥🍜

[acknowledgement]

(≡ ｀ｗ´≡)/
hey everyone!
i'm Uzumaki Naruto
um in my world we give family name first
so you can just call me Naruto!

listen…
i have an important question that i'd like to hear your opinions on

some people doubt this place is really the afterlife
and if we’re actually dead

but let’s say there’s a chance we can all return to our own dimensions, alive
…would you want to?
or would you prefer to stay here instead, permanently?

it’s kinda personal, so i get it if you wanna use the
uh
anonymous
thingy
just don’t ask me how to switch it on
because idk (that means i don’t know)

oh also
if anyone needs help with anything
or wants to tackle some missions together
i'm your shinobi!

[Sorry, Sasuke and Sakura. Naruto forgot the “keep our profession/backgrounds a secret” rule. (And already broke the rule several times over.)]

Comments

[coherer]

Everyone? Just your good friends like that Sasuke guy, you mean?

(the alternative would be INCONCEIVABLE)

[acknowledgement]

not just Sasuke!
you too, Jonas-chan!

[coherer]

(...)

Not to like...... look a gift horse in the mouth or whatever, but why? We barely know each other, man.

If you guys have a chance to bail, you should 100% do that.

[acknowledgement]

what's a gift horse and why would you look at it in the mouth...

i like you! so we're friends
and i'm not leaving my friends behind
i never go back on my word! that's my ninja way!

[...]

pssst Sakura-chan is really mad about me for the shinobi thing
so keep it a secret okay!!!

[NARUTO THIS THREAD ISN'T PRIVATE.]

not here

[chokuto]

1/2

[coherer]

Okay, forget about the horses and shit for a sec.

While there is nothing wrong with relating to the main character of a book, dude, this has gone way too far. ik you think him being a ninja was cool, but that doesn't mean you can go around telling everybody you actually are one. Seriously, it was funny for like .2 seconds and now it's getting super old.

2/2 PRIVATE.

[coherer]

Anyway, I'm not actually pissed off and this is PRIVATE NOW. I'm just trying to help you out for being a good guy. Now respond to my other message sounding super ashamed and embarrassed.

I appreciate you looking out for me. And idk, this is important to Sakura, too. If you're that determined about everything else then this should be a piece of cake for you, right?

1/2

[acknowledgement]

[That first text might not convince everyone, but it certainly convinces Naruto. Disheartened by the rebuke, he struggles against the need to prove himself as the real deal. In the meantime, Jonas' private message reaches him. It takes Naruto a moment, but then he finally understands.]

okay okay
sorry...
i guess since i was named after that character
i got ahead of myself...
i'll stop now

PRIVATE.

[acknowledgement]

HEHEHEHEHEHEHE
that was smart thinking!!
maybe you'd make a good shinobi too

[Yeah, it's all shits and giggles—as if he hadn't mortified Jonas earlier by revealing the body swapping shenanigans. In Naruto's defense...well, there's no defense. Except that he's an idiot.]

[coherer]

Yeah, if I were a shinobi I'd be able to disappear and no one would be ever able to find me.

(realizing it's pointless, jonas gives up. naruto seems fine and noctis is determined to pretend nothing happened. this is typical teenage drama, isn't it? wise enough to know that, he decides that it only seems like a big issue because they're currently entrenched in it.

it isn't. not from the outside looking in. not really.)

Listen, I don't think I thanked you for trying to actually do smth good, and I think that's pretty lame of me. So, idk. Thanks for """kissing me""" ig.

If I'd actually been dying or smth, you'd have really come through with the CPR thing. Did you learn it from Sakura?

[acknowledgement]

nope! every student at the Academy learns it
Sakura-chan knows actual medical ninjutsu
which is way more advanced and REALLY difficult to learn
she was taught personally by Granny Tsunade, one of the most legendary shinobi
and a master of that field
so it goes without saying that Sakura-chan has a LOT of skill as a mednin

[A pause. After witnessing part of Noctis and Sakura's conversation, it seems like he owes Jonas an apology.]

btw... (that means by the way)
oh you'd know that already though
anyway...
i didn't realize anyone could read my messages
i wouldn't have teased you about the kiss in front of everyone if i'd known
sorry Jonas
but i'm really happy that you didn't die

[coherer]

Sakura gets more and more impressive with every passing remark lol, idk how ppl even get that smart, yk?? You too, like I wouldn't jump to CPR that fast with an acquaintance so the credit's all yours, man.

I can take teasing just fine anyway, so dw about it. yk everyone needs a little embarrassment now and then to humble them. You probably saved my ego from getting too big.

I'm just a bit worried about you guys tbh. Like you legit had a bad scare and Noctis is probably more than a little freaked out/humiliated. ik what someone else walking off in your body feels like and it's not cool.

[acknowledgement]

nah i'm not smart
i'm just trained to react fast to this kinda stuff!

don't worry about me! i'm fine
Noctis seems okay too
then again i'm still getting to know him better...

oh did you get your body stolen during the parade too??
who did you swap with! maybe i know them

[coherer]

(he could tell him. he could tell him and possibly get insight into events that transpired on edwards island.

he could tell him, but doesn't.)

I'm not smart either, so you got a friend in me lol I like to think I was equipped with common sense instead yk??

I swapped with Noctis and Set, and they might've been the craziest experiences of my life. Asa, too, but I haven't seen her around recently. I thought we were chill, but I might've spooked her or smth maybe.

(DEPRESSED)

[acknowledgement]

oh me too!
i have tons of common sense

[Wrong.]

dunno who Set or Asa are
but it's hard to believe you could've spooked anyone
you're a good guy, Jonas-chan!
really easy to talk to
but if she's disappeared, maybe we should start a search party?
she could've gotten lost
or taken by a Reaper

[coherer]

("you're a good guy."

no, you're not. if you were, you wouldn't be here, his shadow weighs in, which makes jonas take a moment to himself to rub at his eyes.)

Thanks, Naruto.

ik like we weren't super close so maybe she just stopped texting me or whatever, but you're right that it's become really worrying. I can't have been the only one to notice either, she was p cool yk?

I wish I knew where she was staying.