un: jonas. cw: blood chatter.

[coherer]

ik this is going to sound like an episode of 60 Minutes that never got aired, but I have smelled worryingly like blood for the past week or so.

Please pre-emptively cool it on the wild guesses, though. God forbid any of this winds up vaguely sexual like Keith's thing (F, buddy). No, I haven't even been injured lately. No, it's not my time of the month. No, I'm not actually a murderer. I woke up one day, sniffed foul air, and have been increasingly ill since.

Does anyone have any idea what I can even do about this? bc I feel like I've tried literally everything but bathing in bleach.

Oh, actually, for ppl who don't want to interact with my TMI, what are your favourite movies? I work at the theatre in Mirth now and I'll get a 2% raise if I bring in more traffic, so I kinda have a vested interest in knowing what kinds of things you'd wanna see screened. Set can't pay for everything yk lol.

Thanks.

Comments

[coherer]

No, I'm jk around hahaha

(it happens regularly.)

But you have to sail through dangerous stuff to get to paradise? That doesn't sound very Ascend-y. tbh idk what I expected bc I came into this knowing it wouldn't be like 100% the same as going to Heaven or smth.

No one has any idea what the afterlife of an afterlife is like, probably.

[assana]

Oh! Well. That's a relief!

It really isn't what I expected to be, either... but I don't think anyone knows for sure what it's really like.
Some do claim that you just sort of go... poof. No sailing, no ships. You're here one second, gone the next.
In an explosion of light!
I like the sailing version more, I think.

[coherer]

The sailing version is kinda badass tbh, like the mental image is like smth from a movie lol

Think you'll poof soon? Have you been doing a lot of super good deeds like helping cats out of trees and walking old ladies across the road, etc??

[assana]

Wish I knew! Who knows how it's measured, really???
There IS a set of "primordial truths" that apparently helps.
Let me get it for you... here!

1. Practice patience.
2. Cultivate the higher Self.
3. Conquer the Shadow.
4. Make peace with yourself.
5. Make peace with the universe.
6. Perfect the positive virtues: compassion, courage, creativity, honesty, hope, humility, humor, love, perseverance, self-acceptance, and wisdom.

[coherer]

(............)

Holy shit

Do you have to do ALL of those???? Can you perfect like a couple of them and be sort of decent at the other ones???????

(PANICKING AT HOW SHITTY HE IS)